Fishy Chippy: "Smitty's Famous," Famous for awfulness

We were on the search of fresh, hot Fish & Chips.
Living 20min from the ocean, we're hoping for something fresh. We made a

HUUUUUUUUUGE mistake...

by going to Smitty's Famous Fish & Chicken.

G.
Ross.

The reviews on Yelp, linked above, were all horribly misleading. They must've been written by people who know Smitty's owners or were playing a disgusting prank on the rest of the area. I'm assuming it's also people who live with they fam'ly or use tha innanet at tha lib'ary. Because nobody with they shit tagetha use tha phraze "Off da mutha-freakin' chain!!!" AND afford they own innanet connecky.

That bein' said...
SERVICE:
Wow, faux-thug Asiatic at the counter, acting like we're putting him out by frequenting the shop. Somebody has to keep him wearing fake diamelle earrings. So he can suck fish. 2 of 5 M's, because we were polite and he was still a cocky cock-prick dick wrinkle.

CHOICE:
Lots of choices on the menu for food combos, but why bother when shit is shit, even with a side of less-stinky turdlets?

DINING:
The most prevalent flavor in the food was salt. Next to that was disappointment. I got a 4-piece meal of the red snapper. Oh hey, not only did it come with the skin ON... it also had a belly fin, either the pelvic or the anal. Either way, that set the tone.

It was breaded, NOT battered. Breading is a cheat. Batter is a fluffy, crispy delight. The breading was incredibly salty, overly-peppered, and sheer. My date had bones in her fish.

My 4-piece combo, skipping the fries, had 2 side options! Mac & Cheese and Collard Greens, what I chose. Mac & Peppery Sauce and Collard Green Fartleaves. Gross and grosser. Strike 8.

It was under $20 for the whole experience. The fish was thinly cut, fins and skins ain't much for tastiness, and we won't be going back.

Yelp lies. Smitty's is a fart.

1.5 Mm's.